Ex-Husband’s Regret by Evelyn M.M

Chapter 0149
When I was around her, she rarely smiled. Let alone laugh. If she smiled, it was cold and detached. The fact that someone else
was making her laugh was a F***ing hard pill to swallow.
“Yeah, what did Noah say to make you so mad?” Travis jumps in looking at me curiously.
“Nothing. Just some stuff about their new neighbor being cozy in Ava’s house and making her laugh” I
ground out, fisting my hands.
Travis and Gabe look at each other before laughing. I didn’t care though, because my mind was in turmoil. a
The need to punch something or someone was there and it was F***ing strong. All I could see is red.
There was this primal part of me that wanted to scream that she was mine. That no other man should
dare come close to her.
That part of me took me by surprise because I never considered her as mine. She has always just been
Ava. The woman w
destroyed my F***ing life.
“It’s obvious he’s trying to make you jealous” Gabe states after their laughter dies down. “It’s not a secret that he wants you and
Ava back together. He wanted to see your reaction and from how you’ve reacted it just proves to him that you care about Ava
and that you care a lot”
I glare at my brother. I want to deny what he just said, but I can’t. If I was being honest, then I would admit that I was feeling
jealous. Pure, undiluted jealousy.
I want Ava to smile at me. To laugh a lot around me. I want to be the one in her house helping her set the damn table. Heck, I
want to be the one to help her plant her vegetable garden.
The intense feeling brings my whole world to a stand still. I am Rowan Woods for F***s sake, yet I don’t mind getting down on my
knees, with my hands in the dirt to help Ava plant her garden. As long as I was next to her, as long as I was the only man near

her, then nothing else mattered.
I am shocked as those thoughts cross my mind. I never would have imagined wanting anything to do with Ava, but here I was, a
completely changed man.
“Do you want Ava back?” Travis looks at me seriously.
His question take me aback, but I don’t have a F***ing answer. How do I tell him that I was confused as shit? How do I tell him
that I can’t connect or comprehend all these feelings that were running amuck in my heart. That the intense feelings I have for
Ava now, confused the living daylights out of me?
it just didn’t make any F***ing sense. Why now? Why not all those years back?
The endless questions were giving me a headache. Worst of all, I didn’t have a damn answer to any of
them.
groan then stand up instead of answering. I ignore the questioning looks from my parents, the
triumphant look from Noah and the confused look from Kate.
I needed space to breathe. Space to sort out my head and feelings. I thought I would get it inside the
house away from everyone, but I was wrong.
Emma was sitting in the living room alone.
When she sees me, she jumps on her feet and approaches me.
“Please, Rowan, talk to me. Tell me how I can fix things” she pleads.
I don’t like hurting her, but that’s exactly what I will be doing if I continue giving her false hope. I don’t
want to lead her on. Not when I knew deep down I didn’t feel the same way anymore.
Maybe she also didn’t feel the same. It’s been years. I bet her feelings have changed, but just like how I was before. She’s
refusing to let go of the teenage, young love we had.

Running my hand through my hair, I answer. “You can’t fix anything, Emma. I don’t want to hurt you, but it’s time for us to accept
that our love ran its course”
“Are you telling me you don’t love me? That you love Ava instead?” She asks, shock and heart break. written all over her face.
Just like I did with Travis and Gabe, instead of answering I F***ing walk away.
As the day bleeds to night, I couldn’t help but ask myself the same thing.
If I wasn’t in love with Emma, does that mean I was in love with my ex–wife?