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Complicated - Chapter 37
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“Obviously hyung I would love to hear that but I’m scared…When I see you with Sooya you just seem to be the perfect dad. I also want to be a perfect dad but I’m scared” Namjoon said sighing
“No one is a perfect parent Namjoon trust me. You just have to be the best for your baby. Let’s wait for some time, tell everyone to calm down. If people kept hyping you and Jin and it turned negative then Jin will get sad, he must be more scared right now…With all that he went through he might be even scared to hold that little heart that may have started his journey. You have to become his Dad but he has to become his Eomma and Papa both. I’m not differentiating and stuff but we can’t deny the fact that girls are very good with these things. Even if Min wasn’t trained to be homely she turned out to be a better parent then me. Jin is very thoughtful since he was a kid but mostly he was a rebel, having a kid is rebelling with your own self. It’s like having the biggest smile while you lost everything just to see that little one happy. You’ll sometimes feel that you both are getting distant because of your baby and get frustrated but trust me having them is a bliss” Soo Hyun said smiling
“I hope the results are positive I really want someone to earnestly call me appa and run to me like Sooya does for you. Someone to call me her hero, The best, someone whose face will make my day like Sooya makes yours, someone who’ll make you smile even when you want to cry your eyes out. I can have all these moments with Jin but having a kid to share these memories with will make me happy for infinite generations. I’m so excited just by the thought hyung. Just the thought of a toddler running to me makes my heart flutter.”
“I should warn you this one thing if you become the father of a daughter you’ll lose your sleep” Soo Hyun said laughing
“Why would you say so??” Namjoon looked confused and looked at Sooya who was sleeping in Soo Hyun’s arms
“She’ll be the softest and the loveliest thing in the world. You’ll try protecting her but in the process make her cry. punishing her would be hard but necessary, you’ll feel like naming the world to her but you won’t be able to coz you have to teach her morals. Her tears will make your heart shatter but once in a while you’ll become a reason for them, when she starts growing and all eyes are on her, you’ll try becoming the shield, and the fact that someday a guy will take her from you. Maybe he’ll make her smile keep her happy but just the thought of her going away from you will bring you tears. I swear Sooya’s just 3 but the thought that she’ll grow up and marry someone makes me so scared, the fact that she’ll love some guy maybe he’ll replace me, maybe he’ll become the priority and I no longer will be the one she’s eagerly waiting for makes me feel broken but the fact that she’ll be happy, will have someone who’ll love her the way I do, laugh at her silliness and make her smile when she cries makes me stable for that day.”
“I’ll never let my daughter marry anyone”
“What is Min’s father said the same thing, what if he wanted his daughter all to himself…How will I get my princess?? You know it’s very funny how I can just listen to a 3-year-old when I heard no one in my whole life. I never thought someone could withstand my anger, go through it, even Min couldn’t but with sooya my anger seemed to vanish on its own. For us men we only are real gentlemen when we respect mainly four women, first the one who gave us this life to live, second the one who our own mother gave birth to, we have to become her shield, it’s not necessary to have a sister but the women we pass through maybe someone’s sister, third who left her family and everything behind to start a new life with us; our wife and last but the most important the one who came to us as a blessing, you know I heard this that the ones who become fathers of daughters are the luckiest on this Earth. God chose them to become the guide for his most complicated but beautiful creation who blooms swiftly like a flower and makes your life colourful and mesmerising, the day you’ll hold her for the first time your heart will want to pop out, your tears will be unstoppable, the world won’t make sense anymore, just the little one in your hand will replace everything.”
“I never thought you were so thoughtful like really who are you?? But seriously is having a daughter so enlightening and where did you learn the theory about girls from??”
“You won’t believe but when Jin was 10 he told me this as he had heard it in the moral science class. He asked me what about boys and I told him it’s the same for everyone but people who treat you badly deserve what they did to you. You won’t trust he asked me what if these four people are the ones to do something bad…I only could answer with a ‘let me think for some time'” He said laughing
“Seems like he was full of curiosity” Namjoon said smiling to himself
“I really want to experience what you’re telling… you know the way you smile while explaining me this makes me think that someday we’ll sit together and explain this to Tae…How will I feel…I hope I get a daughter but I also want a son to protect her but the next moment I still wanna be her superhero and having a son would increase competition” Namjoon chuckled at himself
Jin was listening to the brothers with a smile but what he didn’t notice was that he wasn’t alone Soo Min was also standing behind him listening to Soo Hyun explain everything about Sooya. Jin turned and gasped when he saw Soo Min behind her out of nowhere. But Soo Min told him to stay quiet. They kept listening to the brothers talk.
“Joon seems excited.”
“Ya he is. I hope I’m pregnant” Jin said hopefully
“But you realise, don’t you?? How much Hyun hyung loves Sooya” Jin continued smiling
“Hmm I do” Soo Min said
“Then you should go and talk to him” Jin said excitedly
“I will but first I have to apologise to you. Not because I think I did wrong but because I let anger take control of me. I don’t think I did wrong as a mother I was scared for my baby, I’ve kept her in my womb and then stayed away from her and saw her from far when everyone got to enjoy with her and be a part of her life. And about Hyun I’ve been so scared to lose him just like you are scared to lose Joon. But my anger took over me and rather then talking it all out I made a scene moreover I pushed Hobi he must be sad.”
“You are very attached to Hobi aren’t you??”
“I am now, but I wasn’t earlier when he came, I would always push him away, be on my brothers’ side and bully him, make him cry and get scoldings but he was the one who saved me from my blood-related brothers. They say blood is thicker than water but it’s not what comes from the blood that runs in our being it’s our heart.”
“You’re luckier than me”
“Naah we both are lucky just in different ways”
“Soo Min Noona” Jungkook called Soo Min interrupting their conversation
“Yes??”
“Can I borrow her for a second??” Jungkook asked Jin
“Ya sure I was going to Namjoon anyway” Jin said opening the door
“Oh Jin I’ll leave you both talk” Soo Hyun said picking Sooya who snuggled deeper in Hyun’s embrace and mumbled
“Appa it’s cold” In a whining tone in sleep only to be draped by Jin’s jacket and snuggle in her father’s embrace.
After Soo Hyun left Jin laid his head on Namjoon’s lap placing a hand on his womb while Namjoon was ruffling Jin’s hair.
“Joon?? What if I really am pregnant??”
“Everything depends on your decision. I will never force you no matter what happens”
“I know and I want to have this baby but amongst all this chaos I’m scared.” Jin snuggled Namjoon’s waist
“I’ll protect you and our baby both” Namjoon smiled
“And I heard that while mother warms the child Husband warms his bed with other women…”
“Who the heck told you that shit?? That’s just false very very very big lie. The heck!!!! Why would I make you sad when you are bearing my little world” Jin smiled at his comment
“But nothing is confirmed” Jin said as his smile dropped
“It’s ok we’ll wait for it” Namjoon pulled Jin close to his chest and laid his (Jin’s) head on his chest
“You’re so sweet” Jin cooed
“I know” Namjoon said smiling proudly
“Go and get me a pregnancy kit”
“On your duty sir” Namjoon got up and covered Jin with a blanket
“Take rest till I go to the medical store”
“You know you can send someone to get it right??”
“I know but I want to be excited and feel every emotion as a normal human not like a boy born with a silver spoon in hand”
“Woah didn’t know you were like this” Jin said amazed
“Even I didn’t think I’ll be like this only to go through some feelings”
Namjoon left for the infirmary, the whole way he was so excited and praying for the result to be positive. But his excitement was only making him anxious as the traffic showed no sign of ending. After driving for an hour when he bought the thing to confirm his anxiety he rushed his car through shortcuts to Jin. When he returned he instantly started to read about the procedure and regulations. Unaware of the fact that jin had woken up and was looking at Namjoon sitting so seriously reading stuffs on the paper provided. He got up and went near Namjoon and sat near him, but Namjoon didn’t notice him. After reading for half an hour Namjoon looked up and flinched seeing Jin so near to him.
“Woah when did you wake up??” Namjoon asked
“When you were busy reading then…give it to me I’ll go and check” Jin said smiling hopefully to Namjoon
He entered the washroom and took the test. After some minutes he came out with tear-stained cheek. Namjoon immediately hugged him.
“shh what happened tell me…what were the results??” Namjoon asked expectedly