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Love Flavored Latte - Chapter 21
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“You’re Ray’s boyfriend, aren’t you?”
Matt was frozen in place, unable to answer Isaac’s question. How was he supposed to answer any question at all when he himself didn’t even know what was happening at this moment? This dark-haired man just appeared out of nowhere, claimed that he knew Ray, stared at Matt, and now he was asking him if he was Ray’s boyfriend? He couldn’t do anything but give Isaac a very puzzled look. He knew nothing about this man or his relationship with Ray, so he had no idea if he should lie or tell the truth. Luckily, Ray came to his rescue.
“You’re making him uncomfortable, Isaac.” Ray lightly pushed Isaac away. “You haven’t even introduced yourself yet, you know.”
“Oh, right, sorry!” Isaac chuckled as he scratched the back of his head. “I’m Isaac Dawson, Ray’s friend. Best friend, actually.”
“R-Ray’s best friend?” Matt said before realizing that he should greet this man properly. “I’m, I’m sorry if I was being rude! I’m Matthew Parker. N-Nice to meet you, Mr. Dawson.”
Instead of saying something, Isaac just stared at him for a while before frowning like a child. “You call me Mr. Dawson while you call Ray by his first name. Isn’t that a little unfair?”
Matt averted his gaze to avoid Isaac’s sad puppy eyes, asking himself what was even the appropriate response in this case. “I, uh…”
“You’re making me feel like an old man. Just call me Isaac!” The raven-haired man laughed and patted Matt’s back. “Okay, now that the introduction’s done, let’s get back to the main topic.”
Matt’s heart skipped a beat when he realized what Isaac meant.
“Let me ask you one more time.” Isaac grinned mischievously. “Are you Ray’s boyfriend?”
This man sure is persistent, Matt thought as he desperately tried to come up with something to buy some more time. “Wh-What makes you think so?”
“It’s very easy, Matthew.” Isaac straightened up his back as he fixed his glasses, acting like a detective on duty. “You’re the only one with Ray, and your appearance matches the description too.”
“‘Matches the description’?” Matt raised an eyebrow.
“Ray told me a lot about you.” Isaac glanced over Ray, giving him a very cheeky look. “Let me see, he said you have, quote, ‘golden blond hair, beautiful brown eyes and the brightest smile-‘Ow, ow, ow!”
Isaac was suddenly interrupted, yelping in pain as Ray pinched his arm to shut him up.
“Don’t mind what he said, Matt.” Ray had on a very casual smile as he waved his hand in the air, completely ignoring his best friend, who was rubbing his arm where it stung. “You just need to know that he knows about you.”
“Um, okay then…” Matt said before glancing over Isaac, secretly worrying for his arm. “So, when did you tell him about me?”
“Long, long ago!” Isaac returned to his cheerful self in a matter of seconds and startled the couple. “He called me as soon as-“
“I called him after a month we started dating,” Ray answered instead, muffling Isaac’s voice with his hand in the process.
They’re indeed the best of friends, Matt thought as he sweated. They were two grown men, and here they were, acting like two high schoolers when one of them mentioned the other’s crush.
“Alright, for real though…” Isaac’s voice suddenly turned serious, catching the couple’s attention. “Is he your boyfriend?”
Ray stared at him in disbelief before groaning into his palm. “Yes, he is. Can you stop asking that now? I swear if I hear that question one more time-“
“Okay, okay, I won’t ask again. Just want to confirm it.” Isaac chuckled as he patted his friend’s back. “Hey, now that we’re here, how about we have dinner together tonight? My treat.”
“I’m suspicious.” Ray threw him a doubtful look. “I still remember that you never say ‘my treat’ ever.”
“And I still remember that you can’t hold your liquor at all.”
Ray looked as if his self-esteem had been shattered into a million pieces by his best friend’s comeback. He stood there motionlessly before a grin made its way up to his face as he crossed his arms, his blue eyes locked into Isaac’s brown ones. They stared at each other like two opponents on a battlefield, silently waiting for the other’s move.
“Alright, challenge accepted.”
Ray put on a tough look while Matt had a very worried face.
Challenge not accepted, Matt interally said. He didn’t precisely know how high Ray’s tolerance for alcohol was, but from the look of it, he already had a feeling that this wouldn’t go well. And surprisingly, his prediction was correct.
That night, the three of them, along with Isaac’s wife, had a great time together at the dinner table until Isaac ordered some wine. Ray seemed confident to prove Isaac wrong, but he unfortunately failed about an hour later. That was when Matt finally understood why Isaac said Ray was a lightweight drinker-he got drunk just after two glasses. Ray had never drunk alcohol in front of Matt before, though Matt thought it was just because he wasn’t old enough to drink yet. But now, he realized that it probably wasn’t the case. It was possible that Ray barely drank at all, causing him to have low alcohol tolerance.
Seeing his boyfriend in such a drunken state, Matt had to leave early to bring him back to their place. Lying Ray down the bed, Matt let out a sigh, feeling relieved that they were able to return safely.
“Don’t be so reckless like that again, okay?”
Matt whispered as he pushed a strand of hair off his boyfriend’s face and gave him a kiss on the forehead. He sat there with him, looking out of the glass door to admire the sea from afar. It was a breathtaking sight to behold. It was half past seven now, but the night had yet to come, the sky a gradient from blue to orange. He watched the way the warm afternoon sunshine enchanted the ocean, making it sparkle like millions of tiny diamonds. If only Ray had been awake to enjoy this beautiful scenery with him.
Thinking that a stroll on the beach would be nice, he decided to go out and let Ray rest in their room. As he walked along the shore and felt the cool breeze passing by, he spotted a familiar figure sitting from afar. Upon recognizing him, he called out his name.
“Isaac!”
The raven-haired man turned to him and gave him a welcoming smile. “Ah, Matt. I didn’t expect to see you here.”
“Me either,” Matt said as he walked up to him. “Where’s your wife?”
“Oh, she’s gone out with a friend who lives nearby,” Isaac answered. “What about Ray?”
“He’s resting in our room.”
“Figured.” Isaac let out a small laugh. “That guy’s always so cautious, so I don’t know why he suddenly wanted to show off today. Maybe I shouldn’t have roasted him like that.”
“Say, Isaac…” Matt sat down next to him, his eyes filled with curiosity. “How long have you two known each other?”
“Well, we met in high school, so it’s been, let me see, fourteen years or so.”
“Wow, that’s a long time!” Matt gasped. “It’s impressive that you two are still best friends after all these years.”
“Yeah, whenever I think about it, I’m quite surprised too.” Isaac chuckled. “But sometimes, when I’m reminded of him, I suddenly remember about what he’d had to go through.”
Matt tilted his head slightly. “What do you mean?”
“I guess he hasn’t told you then.” Isaac looked at the sea in front of them as he began to think. “Back in high school, he was one of the most popular students ever. I mean, he was good-looking and always got at least a B on every exam, so it would’ve been weird if he hadn’t been popular.”
“I get what you mean.” Matt chuckled.
“But despite his popularity, he was a pretty quiet guy. It wasn’t like he was cold or anything, he was in fact very friendly. It’s just that he was a little shy. I always wanted to strike up a conversation with him, but I was afraid I’d bother him, until one day he came to me himself…”
…__________…
“Hey, Isaac…”
A tap on the shoulder jolted Isaac out of his thoughts. He glanced up to see a pair of blue eyes looking down at his gloomy brown ones. Normally, he would be extremely happy to talk to the boy who was admired by all. But right now, he couldn’t help feeling ashamed. Everyone had left and they were the only ones on the hallways, but just Ray’s gaze alone was enough to make him nervous and embarrassed.
He turned away as he tried to hide his exam paper. “Sorry, I’ve got to go now.”
“Wait!” Ray held his arm, stopping him from leaving. “I’m not trying to make fun of you.”
“Then why are you here?” Isaac knew that he was pushing Ray away by doing this, which was why his mind was yelling at him and begging him to stop. However, at this moment, he absolutely couldn’t bring himself to look at the other in the eye. “You just got an A+ in chem, and here I am, sulking over an F. We don’t belong to the same world, Ray.”
“Don’t say that! It’s true that I just saw Mrs. Bell talking to you about your grade, but I really don’t mean to do anything bad!” Ray said, still keeping a tight grip on the other’s arm. “I-I want to help you study and improve!”
Isaac stared at Ray for a while, trying to find mockery and insincerity in his voice and expression, but there was no trace of it. His eyes showed honesty and care, and in his tone was determination and seriousness. A few seconds ago, Isaac was still trying to find an excuse to refuse Ray’s help, but now, something in his mind was telling him to trust the boy in question. After all, Ray had willingly approached him to offer his help without any sign of arrogance in him.
Plus, maybe he really needed to do something about his grade. Chemistry had always been his greatest enemy, and he still had four long years to go until he could escape from this hell of a subject for good. If he kept failing chemistry, then he didn’t know if he could even survive high school.
For all these reasons, he gave in and sighed.
“W-Will you really help me?”
“Of course!” Ray said confidently. “I promise to help you so that you can at least get a passing grade.”
At the end of the semester, Isaac got a D in chemistry.
…__________…
“That’s such a great way to start a friendship,” Matt said in amazement.
“To be honest, I’m really glad I thought it through.” Isaac scratched the back of his head in a rather embarrassed way. “That day, if I’d refused his offer out of shame, I would’ve really regretted it.”
“I’m glad too.” Matt smiled. “If you’d turned him down, you would’ve never become friends.”
“Yeah…” Isaac trailed off before continuing. “We began helping each other out as much as we could. We’ve created good memories and shared our secrets. I found out Ray did have one subject that he was bad at.”
“What is it?” Matt would be lying if he said he wasn’t eager to know.
“PE.” Isaac had an amused grin on his face. “He may look pretty good at it, but he admitted he always struggled in PE class. I was good at it so I gave him a helping hand. We basically balance each other out.”
Isaac said that, but he was secretly sulking because he knew that Ray still won in this case. That guy might be absolutely terrible at sports, but his looks after every PE class had the girls gawking at him, making him outshine every single guy that was present at that moment. Seriously, who the hell looked that good while covered in sweats?
“That’s what good friends do, isn’t it?”
“That’s right.” Isaac quickly brushed off his internal pain after hearing Matt’s voice. “He’s actually one of the greatest friends I’ve ever had. He’s nice, kind, generous and always willing to lend an ear. However…”
Isaac’s tone suddenly turned sad, a downcast look visible on his face. “There’s not a lot of people who know his own troubles, specifically in his love life.”
“His… love life?” Matt’s voice had a hint of surprise and curiosity.
“Being popular made it difficult for him to find true love.” Isaac gazed at the ocean with a thoughtful expression. “As he was surrounded by people all the time, he had a hard time deciding if a person’s feelings were genuine.”
…__________…
“Sometimes, I envy you, Isaac.”
“Huh?” Isaac looked up from his notebook and raised an eyebrow at Ray, who then sighed.
“You barely have any trouble in finding love.”
Isaac choked.
“Dude, don’t be ridiculous.” Isaac managed to speak again after a few coughs. “Many guys wish they could become you so that literally every girl would be head over heels for them!”
“No, no, you didn’t get my point.” Ray shook his head and glanced down at his hands. “I mean, like, if a person confess to you and you feel the same way about them, then you can accept their love right away. You don’t need to ask yourself if their feelings are true, if they really love you or just want to take advantage of you.”
Isaac was silent, not knowing what to say. They had been friends for three years but Ray had never talked about something like this until now. They were at Isaac’s house for a study session and there was no one else in the room besides them, so maybe that was why Ray decided to bring it up.
Isaac couldn’t help acknowledging the truth in Ray’s words. Although he often complained about not having a girlfriend, his love life was really less complicated. A regular person could easily accept a romantic confession if the feelings between them were mutual. But for a popular student like Ray, it wasn’t that simple. Many girls just flirted with him and wanted to claim him just because he was handsome and well-known. A lot of them held shallow love which would immediately fade as soon as Ray was no longer good-looking or popular.
“I had a crush on a guy in middle school.”
Ray said out of the blue, snapping Isaac out of his thoughts.
“A guy?” Isaac had a rather shocked look. “Are you saying that you’re…”
“Yes,” Ray replied without needing Isaac to finish his sentence. “That guy was my classmate and also the person who made me aware of my sexuality. At first, I thought I just admired him for his outgoing nature, but then I started to realize I liked him more than a friend. I had a crush on him for one year until I found out he’d got a new girlfriend.”
“One whole year?” Isaac had almost let out a gasp. “That… must’ve hurt.”
“It did hurt, but something even more painful happened.” Ray fiddled with his pen. “In my last year of middle school, a guy confessed to me and we began dating. But after just one month, he admitted he dated me just to be famous. He then left me for a more popular guy.”
“Ray…” Isaac reached out his hand and touched Ray’s shoulder. “I’m so sorry you had to go through all that.”
“Don’t worry, Isaac. What happened, happened. I just needed it to… get it off my chest.” Ray gave him a rather sad smile. “Besides, we’ve been friends for so long that I feel that I shouldn’t hide things from you. Thank you, Isaac, for listening to me without judging.”
“It’s nothing, Ray. I’ll always be there to lend you an ear whenever you need someone to talk to.” Isaac fell silent for a while before he continued, his voice having a hint of concerns. “Have you told anyone about your… sexuality?”
“Almost every student from my middle school knew about it. But here in high school, I’ve only told you.”
“Do you plan to tell your parents?”
“After I turn eighteen.”
Isaac raised an eyebrow. “Why so specific?”
Ray looked down at his hands again with a dejected gaze.
“Because when I’m eighteen, I can just move out if they hate me for being gay.”
…__________…
Matt was speechless.
“Yeah, that sounds depressing, I know. But don’t worry, his parents have accepted him.” Isaac said when he saw Matt’s bewildered face. “When he told me all that, I was shocked too. He always seemed so calm and carefree. Who knows that he had so much on his mind?”
“I’m relieved that his parents accepted him. He seemed like he’d had to go through a lot already,” Matt said. “So, what happens next?”
“He got a new boyfriend about five months later.”
For some reason, the way Isaac said it was even gloomier than before. He bit his lips, his eyes narrowing and his hands clenching.
“What’s wrong?” Matt gave him a worried look.
“Ah, it’s nothing. It’s just that…” Isaac appeared to be having a hard time talking. “Whenever I think about that guy, I get a little mad.”
“Are you talking about his ex? What did he do?”
“Well, he…”
…__________…
“He cheated on me.”
Isaac was in disbelief, his body motionless.
“He what, Ray?”
“He cheated on me. Aaron cheated on me.” Ray trembled, his eyes glued to the ground to hide the tears threatening to roll down his face. “He, he was secretly kissing a girl behind a tree… When she asked him ‘Don’t you have a boyfriend?’, he just coldly answered ‘I don’t care.’ He, he said I’m boring to date…”
Isaac couldn’t hold back his temper no matter how hard he tried. There was absolutely no way he could stay calm in this situation. Not only had Ray been betrayed, but he’d also had to hear those cruel words from the person he trusted. From the moment Ray walked into class with red eyes this morning, Isaac had already known that something was wrong, but this was out of his expection.
“That, that bastard!” Isaac’s angry tone made his voice almost sound like a shout. “How dare he say that? I swear I’m going to find him and-“
“Calm down, Isaac.” Ray held his friend’s arm, his eyes still looking down. “You don’t need to get involved in this.”
“B-But-“
“It’s okay,” Ray said with a small voice. “I’m going to break up with him tomorrow. You don’t need to do anything.”
Everything fell into silence and Isaac just stood there, frozen in place. Seeing his best friend like this made him furious and sad at the same time. He couldn’t do anything but sigh and pat Ray on the shoulder.
“Moving on can be hard, Ray, but I believe in you!” Isaac tried to be positive. “Be the best version of yourself! Make him regret leaving you. Find someone else who’s worth your love-“
“I give up.”
“Huh?”
Isaac’s motivational energy was interrupted by Ray’s hollow and sorrowful voice. The brunet finally looked up with empty eyes, startling the other boy.
“I give up on love.”
“R-Ray, don’t say that…” Isaac’s tone had a hint of panic. “Aaron’s a jerk, but it doesn’t mean everyone’s like him. I’m sure there’s someone out there who-“
“Thanks for comforting me, Isaac, but my fate’s already been decided.” Ray shook his head, his voive shaky. “There’s no hope left for my pathetic love life. I’m… I’m lost. I don’t know what to do anymore. My first crush didn’t like me back, my first boyfriend only cared about my fame and my second boyfriend cheated on me.”
Isaac was at a loss for words. He wanted to say something but he somehow was unable to even open his mouth. Just when he was still wondering what to do, Ray spoke again. His voice was firm, yet his eyes held a desolate and despairing look.
“I’m tired of this. I can’t afford to have my heart broken again. I’ll spend the rest of my life without a partner and that’s my final decision.”
…__________…
“From then on, even though he was still the kind-natured Ray that everyone adored, something in him had changed.” Isaac sighed. “He refused to fall in love again. He rejected every confession and ignored every love letter. There was always a distant and icy look in his eyes whenever love was mentioned.”
“Gosh…” Matt covered his mouth and turned away in shock. “I’ve been dating him for three months, yet I’ve never heard of this until now.”
“Don’t blame yourself. He’s been keeping this a secret for who knows how long, so no one knows about this besides me.” Isaac patted the other’s back. “Everyone thinks he’s still single because he hasn’t found the right one yet.”
Isaac paused for a few seconds, thinking about what he had just said before chuckling.
“Well, maybe they’re right after all.”
“What do you mean?” Matt’s head perked up.
“He swore he’d never date anyone ever again, yet here he is, in a relationship with you.” Isaac let out a light-hearted laugh. “What you’ve done is… incredible, Matt. His heart’s been broken for years, but you came and healed it. When he told me he’d found someone, I was surprised and relieved at the same time.”
On Isaac’s lips was a smile, a very gladsome one. “I still remembered how happy he sounded on the phone. He told me many things about you, how you made his days brighter and how he felt lucky to have you by his side.”
Matt blushed, unable to muster a word.
“I was so eager to meet this special someone of his. I wanted to meet the person who was able to give him hope once more.” Isaac then turned over him, scratching his head in embarrassment. “That’s why I was so excited to finally meet you. Sorry if I scared you this morning.”
“It’s okay, Isaac. In fact, I have to thank you for telling me this…” Matt spoke with a quiet voice, his mind full of thoughts as he gazed at the ocean. “I never knew Ray’s had to go through so much pain. Moreover, those wounds have lingered with him for so many years straight. He must’ve felt so lonely.”
“Indeed. He kept denying it, but I knew that deep down, he still wanted to find true love.”
Isaac put a hand on Matt’s shoulder, making Matt look over him. Through Isaac’s eyes, Matt could sense hope and trust that he had for him.
“Matt, please, take care of him for me. Be the sunshine of his life. Make him happy.”