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Love Flavored Latte - Chapter 23
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Ray let out a sigh as he walked up to his house’s front entrance, fumbling for his key once he was in front of it. It had been a long tiring day for him. Not only did he have classes to teach, but he also had to work until late in his office. It made him think of how he sometimes envied his students. When he was still one, he had complained about how much work he was given and how he had wished he could just graduate as soon as possible. But then, despite all that, at least he could still take some time off school work during summer break. Now, as a professor, he could no longer have a proper break, because he had to come to the university to teach summer classes. He really hadn’t thought of this when he decided to become a college professor.
Unlocking the door and stepping inside, he had expected silence when something, or rather someone, rushed to him.
“Ray, you’re back!”
Ray was startled for a moment, but upon seeing who it was, a smile bloomed on his lips as he patted the younger man’s head.
“I’m home, Matt.”
That’s right, I have a boyfriend now.
Ray thought as he took in Matt’s smile, the beam that always brightened up his mood. This moment seemed like something typical of an everyday life, but to Ray, it was a scene straight out of his dreams. Being greeted by his partner at the door after a long day, it was something he had thought he could never experience.
From time to time, when he came home weary from work, the silent atmosphere of his house strangely felt gloomy to him. It weighed his heart down and made him nostalgic, reminding him of the hopes and dreams he had abadoned. He remembered how he had wished to come home and be welcomed by a cozy air, with his partner greeting him and his children running up to him.
He knew that from the minute he decided to stay single for the rest of his life, that ideal image of a happy family would forever be a far-fetched dream. It felt exactly like a beautiful painting being smashed into thousands of pieces. He had comforted himself over and over again, saying that looking at those shattered pieces was better than getting his heart broken again. Even so, whenever that thought crossed his mind, he was no longer in the mood to even have dinner that day.
But things had changed, because he had his angel by his side now. This summer, he wouldn’t be coming back to an empty house anymore, since Matt would be living with him until the new semester began. Neither of them could believe that this was actually happening. The moment the idea popped up in Ray’s mind, it seemed rather extreme, sending a wave of nervousness through him. But he eventually ended up deciding to ask Matt about it because the latter had to move out of his dorm during summer vacation, which would be a good opportunity for them to try living together. The look on Matt’s face that day was still vivid in his mind. He had on a very dumbfounded expression and his eyes were fixated on the key before him as if it was hypotizing him.
Thinking about it made Ray chuckle sometimes, but it did stir up a tingling feeling everytime he was reminded of it. He felt less lonely whenever he returned to a quiet house, because he knew that after Matt came back from his parents’ place, they would start living together. The one-month wait was truly worth it.
Not only did he come home to a warm welcome and a delicious meal, he also got the chance to know the feeling of being taken care of. Being a busy professor, he usually overworked himself, staying up until midnight or every early in the morning to finish his work. He would then found himself waking up with papers surrounding him and realizing that he had fallen asleep at his desk, which was something that had happened very frequently. Although he knew it was unhealthy, he couldn’t really do anything about it.
Tonight was no exception, though there was an element of surprise. He was at his desk like usual, his typing the only sound in his office, when the sleepiness began to get to him. This was nothing new to him and he was used to the tiredness anyway, so he decided to push himself and try to finish his work. He knew full well that he still had another whole week to complete it, but he, as always, told himself it was better to finish it in advance. That way, he would always have enough time to fix mistakes if there was any.
With that thought in mind, he went on working until someone knocked on the door and scared the ghost out of him.
“Ray, are you in there?”
He let out a sigh of relief upon recognizing his boyfriend’s voice. Being so used to the silence at night, the knocking sound startled him for a second there. He rubbed his eyes and answered in a clear voice, trying to make it sound like he wasn’t tired at all.
“Yeah. Is there anything you need?”
“No, it’s just, um…” Matt stuttered. “I noticed that you’re still working so, uh, I brought you some s-strawberries. C-Can I come in?”
Despite being exhausted, Ray couldn’t help smiling. Was this the reason why Matt sounded so nervous? It was cute in a way, to be honest.
“Of course.”
The clicking sound of the door was heard and came in his beloved with a plate full of fresh strawberries. Placing it beside Ray’s computer, Matt took a closer look at his boyfriend and knitted his brows. The fact that Ray was still working was enough to worry him as it was, and seeing his weary face pained him even more. He brushed a strand of hair off Ray’s eyes as he spoke.
“Why are you still up at this hour? It’s almost one in the morning.”
“I should be the one asking you that.” Ray let out a small laugh to hide his exhaustion. “I told you to go to bed first, didn’t I?”
“I did, but…” Matt trailed off. “When I woke up a while ago, I couldn’t find you next to me, so I went to look for you to find you still working.”
Ray sighed, averting his gaze. “I’m sorry for leaving you alone like that.”
“That’s not the point here.” Matt held his boyfriend’s shoulders and said with a gentle yet worried voice. “You should get some sleep or at least rest a little. It’s not good to overwork yourself like this.”
Ray was quiet for a while, looking at how Matt’s concerned eyes were focused on him, making him wonder if he really should follow his advice and join him on the bed. He had to admit that lying down on the bed and get some actual sleep sounded like a great idea right now, but the thought of leaving his work midway kind of bothered him. Of course, like his mind had told him a million times already, he still had a lot of time to work on it, but his stubborn determination still won him over in the end.
“Just a little longer and I’ll go to bed, I promise.”
He pulled Matt’s face closer to kiss him on the forehead, seemingly as a way to get a little energy from it. Matt was about to protest and insisted that Ray stop working, but he decided against it and smiled.
“Okay. But if I don’t see you next to me in the morning, I’ll never let you work late again. Got it?”
“Got it.”
Matt gave him one last kiss on the cheek before heading to the door, though he hesitated for a few seconds beforehand. It was true that Matt sometimes overworked as well, but it really troubled him to see his partner working his fingers to the bones and drained himself of his energy. He wished that he had been able to convince him to go to bed, but since he couldn’t do it, the least he could do was to come and show that he cared for his well-being.
His hand was inches away from the doorknob when Ray’s voice made it stop in its track.
“Matt, wait.”
Matt turned around to see Ray looking at him with his eyes full of fondness and sincerity.
“What is it, Ray?”
“I…” Ray paused for a while as if thinking carefully about his words. “I want to thank you for everything you’ve done for me.”
Matt was caught off guard upon hearing what he wasn’t expecting. “Thank me for what? I’ve done nothing special.”
“You have, even if you don’t realize it.” Ray’s voice sounded so sentimental and had a hint of nostalgia. “To tell you the truth, I… have always dreamt of the day when I finally come home to a loving greeting and a homemade meal. And tonight was the very first time I had someone come to my office and remind me to go to sleep after all these lonely years. This might sound childish, but I’m very grateful for it.”
The whole room was silent once again, but it wasn’t the same type of silence that always surrounded Ray before. It was an heartfelt one, a quietness that somehow soothed him. Maybe it was because of Matt, the person who was at the other end of the room and whose brown eyes were staring at him in bewilderment. Or maybe it was because he was finally able to let his partner know a small piece of his mind, even though it might not be nothing big compared to the other thoughts he had kept hidden ever since forever. There was still so much more that he had yet to tell Matt, but he had decided to take it slow. Among all the baby steps he had to take, this would be the very first one, a small but important one that would slowly led him to develop more courage. It could take a rather long time, but it was not a problem.
After a few seconds, Matt’s stunned expression turned into a soft one with a smile blooming on his lips.
“I… I didn’t know it means that much to you, Ray.” Matt’s voice was small and tender, sounding almost like a whisper. “I do it simply because I love you, and—”
Matt’s confession was cut short when he realized the three words he had just said out loud. And he was certain he couldn’t just take it back and pretend to wave it off as nothing, because the other had clearly heard it, judging by the way he gasped and how his pen dropped from his hand and landed onto the floor beneath them.
Matt began to fret.
He knew he shouldn’t fret. He felt like he wasn’t even supposed to fret in the first place, but he couldn’t help it. The first “I love you”, he had always regarded it as something magical. In his mind, it was a moment full of indescribable emotions, something that would make you smile like there was no tomorrow or cry tears of joy. But the situation at hand was completely the opposite to his imagination.
It wasn’t that he didn’t feel that way. In fact, he had felt the need to say it for a while now. Having been six months into his relationship with Ray, he was certain of his feelings and ready to say it, but he feared that rushing it might have a negative effect on the other. Ray was still trying to recover from his past love life, so what if he wasn’t prepared to hear it yet? What if hearing those significant three words didn’t make him happy, and instead, they caused bad memories to return to him? What would Ray think of him after this?
Screaming internally at himself and scolding his reckless self to no end, he snuck a glance at Ray and regretted it immediately. The pen had long been abadoned and its owner paid it no mind. His blue eyes were glued to him and his mouth was agape, his body frozen in place. Seeing that there was no way of escaping from this awkward situation, he began to ramble without a single idea about what he was even doing.
“I-I’m sorry! I, I spoke without thinking.” He stumbled over his words. “I’m, I’m really sorry i-if you don’t like it. I, uh, I’ll be going now—”
When he finally realized it, Ray was alright standing behind him, wrapping his arms tightly around his waist, as if Ray was afraid that Matt would dissappear forever as soon as he stepped out of the room. Ray leaned closer to the other’s ears and whispered in an almost pleading voice.
“Don’t go, please,” he said quietly. “Tell me I didn’t mishear what you just said.”
Bracing himself, Matt repeated those exact words.
“I love you.”
Silence fell upon them once again and they just stayed like that, Matt standing right in front of the door and Ray holding him firmly against his chest. It felt as if the world around them had stopped moving until Ray’s voice was heard.
“I love you too.”
Now it was Matt who needed his partner to repeat himself.
“I love you, more than I can ever put into words.” Ray fulfilled his request without him having to say it. “You have no idea how happy I am to hear those words coming from you. I almost couldn’t my ears anymore.”
Bewildered once more, Matt was speechless, but he soon let out a sigh of relief and reached up one hand to cup the other’s cheek, feeling tears threatening to roll down his face and doubts leaving him at once. No worries were left in his mind and only happy thoughts remained.
“I’m glad to hear that you feel the same way.”
Smiling, he had expected the sentimental moment to last for a little while longer when he was suddenly picked up. Bridal style.
“H-Hey, what are you—”
He yelped and was instantly cut off with a passionate kiss on the lips. He melted into it, forgetting what he was about to say and wrapping his arms around the other’s neck to pull him closer. It was a quick kiss, but it was enough to make both of them breathless. Matt held his boyfriend’s face tenderly as he chuckled.
“Geez, what’s gotten into you suddenly? You were being emotional just now.”
“Sorry, couldn’t hold myself back.” On Ray’s face was a radiant smile, entirely different from the exhausted look he had a moment ago. He leaned down to kiss Matt on the forehead, a small giggle leaving him. “I’m just overjoyed to hear my angel saying he loves me for the first time.”
Matt would have returned his smile if it weren’t for what Ray had just used to call him. His face burned up, a dark red blush tinting his cheeks.
“Wh-Wh-What did you just call me?”
“Angel.”
Ray answered nonchalantly as if it was nothing out of the ordinary.
Matt was at the loss for words. His face was so hot and his heart was beating so fast that he felt like he could explode at any given second.
“Ray!” He exclaimed as he covered his face with both of his hands. “D-Don’t say s-such embarrassing thing!”
“But it’s true. You’re my little angel that I’ll forever hold in my arms.”
The only thing that was leaving Matt’s lips right now was confused and flustered nonsense. Hearing Ray’s laughter, he couldn’t help peaking from behind his fingers and took in Ray’s beautiful smile, which caused him to become even more bashful.
“Okay, okay, I’ll stop. For now, at least.” Ray’s chuckle was light-hearted with a mixed of mischieviousness. “But I’m not putting you down.”
Speaking of which, Matt suddenly realized how surprisingly strong his boyfriend was. He picked Matt up in the matter of second with seemingly no effort at all, and up until now, he showed no sign of tiredness.
“Then are you going to stand here till morning?” Matt let out a small laugh.
“Of course not. I’ll let you know I’d secretly unlocked the door when I was getting ready to pick you up,” Ray replied playfully, titlting his head to draw attention to the already agape door. “I changed my mind. I’m going to stop working and go to sleep right now, but only if you let me carry you to bed like this.”
Matt’s face was like a volcano that was on the verge of erupting. Going to his bedroom wouldn’t take long since it was right next to his office, but just the thought of it made him blush madly. However, he would be lying if he said he didn’t like how that sounded.
“O-Okay…”
“Oh, and one more thing,” Ray suddenly added. “Tell me you love me on the way there.”
That request, Matt could fulfill. And so, the hallway was filled with Matt’s whispers of love words, sounding quietly in the night but ringing loudly and endlessly in the brunet’s mind.