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Love You Or Hate You I Can't Decide BOOK 1, Season 1&2 - Chapter 208
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- Love You Or Hate You I Can't Decide BOOK 1, Season 1&2
- Chapter 208 - “His file with his deepest love”
Episode- 206 “His file with his deepest love”
Alisa’s POV:
I am searching for my belongings in Edwin’s room but nothing good sees
to come to me..
I searched under the bed, in
drawers of night stand… every shelf, every place.. where is it..… I am
searching like a crazy person and my hands are still empty…. The only place
where my things can be are his cupboard… I tried to open it but it’s locked… I
cursed in frustration… but a sudden memory flashed in my mind, I saw a key in
the night stand… but will it fit…
I prayed this key would fit… I whispered, “Please fit” if it fits
everything can change, I inserted the key and started moving it.. I heard the
it open and almost jumped in happiness as I heard that tiny sound… I feel like
some kind of agent … so proud…
… soon I pushed myself away from this small celebration and I started
searching one side of the closet and it’s filled with clothes… his clothes, I
touched it and was lost for a moment.. it smells like him… I was holding the piece of cloth as if my
heart lives in it, I wiped my tear and I reminded myself about the situation
and quickly searched it and had nothing in my hand after the search.. I almost
destroyed this half closet… I slide the cupboard door to look on other side…
but I was stunned by the view inside it… what the hell….
I saw two dresses, why does he has women’s clothing in his closet…
f*cking playboy.. I was angry and this made me look at those outfit with more
concern and hate at the same time, if I am more accurate I saw them somewhere….
And my eyes landed on the tags, it still has tag’s on… I read the tag as I hold
it between my fingers , it’s from my store…. Ahh.. Are they the same dresses
Edwin bought that day from, he insulted me, called me ugly and said it was for
Ruth… but it’s still untouched,,,, he never gave it to anyone then why did he
get it,,, why does he still have them…. what is this man.. why is he so
unpredictable and hard to understand…
Anyways,, I shouldn’t be thinking about that… I have more important
things to do…… I looked for my things and found them at last, my passport and
Visa, my wallet is also there…. I feel like I win a war… I checked the passport
and smiled at I conformed it’s mine… I moved to take the visa and wallet but a
file dropped, it was under my things…….. I checked my wallet and it still has
my cards and some cash.. untouched… then I went to the file.. what is it…
I quickly picked it up to keep it in its place like nothing happened, then I will sneak out… but something
catch my attention, the file…. I flipped it open, I saw my picture on the very first page
with my details, from my name to my blood group, to my interests, it even has
my school name, every school I changed as its name on it, my parents detail my
family detail everything.. but why… this got me tensed, but the picture of me
was from my high school when my hair’s use to be around my shoulder, tied in a
pony… why is there these picture from all these years…
What is all this?… I flipped the page and saw more of my pictures, in
those I was doing some regular things, there was note on that page, ‘she is so
innocent and pure… that I want to treasure her, my heart is betraying myself…
why do I feel for you Alisa Scott…. You are utterly dangerous for me’ what?…
what is this.. dangerous?… me?…
I flipped the pages, each of them had some pictures or detail about me
and a note which I clearly remember to be Edwin’s handwriting, it’s like a
journal… I subconsciously sat on the bed.. I read a note ‘today, I ended those
to tried to hurt her, they bully her, they made her cry for no reason… I would
kill everyone who will treat her bad..’… he killed the bully.. Edwin killed my
bully to help me.. that means he knew me before I know.. I thought it was in my
parent’s house on a dinner… but he knew me from high school…. Then why did he
insulted me when we first met…
Next page, ‘this week she was not bullies as I got the news… she seemed
to be more relax… at least if I can’t show my love for her, I can make her
comfortable by little efforts..’
I flipped the page again, I read, “So.. she likes ice cream when she is
sad… but I noticed these marks on her neck even through these pictures.. they
told me her mom hit her because of her sister…. Ahh,… she suffers.. I don’t
feel god about it…” he knew about every single thing about me.. what is it…
On the other page, “I just return to see
her after 2 days and first thing I did was went to see her secretly hiding my
face.. seeing her from far away….she smiled at her friend … and it felt great
to see her like that… I wanted go to her and kiss her.. but I will only bring
her problem… and I can’t risk my grandpa’s efforts to waste because I like this
girl…” I covered her mouth as I was out of words….
After few pages,
‘she graduated today, I was not their but my men told me it went well… she
must be happy I wish I can share those with her…. but I can’t…’
‘she spend her birthday alone… like she does every year, I want to make
efforts but I maybe put her in some danger if she caught attention….. but I
heard her best friend got her a cake and they celebrated it alone in a
apartment like a broke person.. when she deserves more’ he always remembered
it.. Edwin you are making me cry and guilty.. why…
‘today, I am proud of my little dove, yea I named her that, she is so
pure that I need to do it… she got her first job… she must be excited…. I made
sure to fire the old pervert from the company so she won’t be sexually abused..
that old pervert has his records.. I don’t want him to make her feel
uncomfortable’… he done all of this though the years to protect me without
coming out.. but never told me…why is he saying he needs to keep me face.. I
know now he was always in danger….
‘I met her today at her parent’s place… I
knew she lives in the same area but I didn’t know she lived in that house, she
approached me but threw water on her and said mean things…. I was hurt by her
tearful eyes, but I had no other way to keep her away from me… how can I tell
her I like her too.. I shouldn’t … I will stop her from coming to me…’ tear
roll down even though I don’t want to cry…. But this didn’t stop me from
reading further..
‘today I agreed to her sister as he fake
boyfriend… so just little dove would hate me… I hate myself when she is hurt…
but I will do everything possible to keep her away from this…’
‘I heard that she moved out… I am really
worried, will she be ok all by herself….. that place is not good.. crime rate
is more, I appointed some people in her
front door so I can insure she is safe…. I hope she doesn’t do something stupid ’ I wiped my tears as my vision is
blurring up… Edwin.. you crazy jerk.. you a**hole.. if you liked me all this
time then why do you hide it…
‘I have another proud day add to this
list… my little dove opened her own store… she looked happy from those
pictures… she must be working hard.’ I
whispered as I flip the page, “Stupid jerk..” but I couldn’t hate him for this
‘today I got attacked so I am ending this
thing here… I am ending everything that calls me to give her attention… this
attack was like a tight slap on my face making me understand, I shouldn’t drag
her in this… I am stopping my feelings for you… from today… I would hate you
the same way you do… I will try not to love you Alisa Scott.. I will hate you’
My tears were wetting my cheeks, I was on
the last page… it had number of pages but still they were not enough to tell me
that what I read was real.. I was frustrated I moved my hair away from my face…
I said to myself, “He like me for that
long then… why… all this”