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Man Of Probabilities - Chapter 51
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Suzuki Kazuya’s POV
“I have a house call from one of my patients so I have to leave by 8 AM.” Yuki said while we are eating our breakfast together.
I am already used to him having an appointment during weekends and I have a trust in him that he will not keep any secrets from me but last night, he is acting a little bit off. I can feel that something is up; my heart is telling me that he is lying, that he has someone else to meet with today.
“Okay, then we should head out together after this; my job will also start by 8 AM.” I answered him although it is actually 9 AM.
We take our separate path when we arrived at the cross road but he have no idea that I took a step back and followed him towards his destination when he turned his back from me. After walking a few more minutes, the street view becomes familiar and leads to the cafe we visited last time. He took a moment before entering the place, and as I follow him with my gaze while standing at the other side of the road, I found the person he is meeting in secret today; it was Hisashi-san.
I wanted to go in and hear out everything they have to talk about as soon as I can but it must the fate playing some kind of trick on me because as soon as I step forward, someone hold me up.
“Suzuki-kun, I thought you have a new part time job today in the new flower shop? Isn’t this the opposite direction from that place?” A senior co-worker from one of my part time job was passing by and saw me.
“Oh it’s you senpai, actually I have still an hour before my works starts so I am just walking around to have uhm- some exercise.” I just wanted to enter the cafe immediately but I don’t want to be rude with my senior because he is one of the good guys who always give me extra jobs whenever he finds one.
“I see, did you already eat breakfast? I can treat you some coffee if not.”
“No, I am already full. By the way, thank you for introducing me to the owner of the flower shop.”
“Oh it is not a big deal. He is actually my friend in high school and he offered the job to me first but I have allergies to some flowers so I cannot take the job.”
“But I’m still thankful. I should be the one treating you a meal when I got my pay check there.”
“Then I am looking forward to it.”
“I should be going now, bye senpai.” I ended the conversation smoothly and pretended to walk away until he is completely gone and then I run back towards the cafe and dash inside as fast as I can.
Yuki was facing his back towards me while Hisashi on the other hand is sitting in front of him.
“Nao, no I can’t accept this. There is still a chance right?” I can see clearly how terrified Hisashi-san is making while talking to Yuki as soon as I arrive at the scene.
“No, I am already at the dead end.”
“But those probabilities you are seeing for a long time, it can be change right? Probabilities aren’t constant and can still be affected by whatever we do right?” This is the first time I witness Hisashi-san acting so desperate and scared. It makes me stop from interfering with them because it feels like it is something that I am not ready to hear yet.
“No, this time it is different. Whatever I do, the only thing that changes is the rising probabilities for each day that passes.”
“But why?! Why are you acting so calm right now, why are you acting as if you already accepted your fate? Nao please don’t give up!” The tears he is badly holding out finally pour down with all his emotions.
“I have no choice. This is the only thing I can do, to accept it and at least let someone survive. This is the best for all of us.”
“Best for us? Do you even know how we will feel if you die? Do you even imagine how painful it will be for us to just accept that? How about Kazuya? Did you even take that kid as a consideration when you give up all hope? Nao please stop acting so selfish!”
Die? What is going on here? I don’t have any idea on what they are talking about but my heart is aching as if I know the pain that Hisashi-san is suffering right now. Without any hesitation, I bravely step in and join their conversation.
“Yuki, what is happening right now? What do you mean die? Please tell me that this is all a joke.”
His eyes widened and his reaction is full of shock when I hit my hands on the side of their table.
“Kazuya- give me a chance to explain. I know this is too sudden but-“ I pull him up from his chair and dragged him out of the cafe leaving the dumbfounded Hisashi-san who is still crying in his seat.
“This is not the place for me to hear everything you need to say. Let’s go back to your place.”
I did not let go of his hand until we reach his place while not uttering any words to each other.
“Kazuya, I am very sorry if this is too sudden but I swear, I swear that I did not intend to keep this as a secret from you. I am just looking for a chance to tell it to you in a way that will not hurt you.”
“A way that will not hurt me? Do you think that anything will change just because you will tell it in any way? What’s wrong with you?!”
“Kazuya please listen to me first! Please calm down.” He asking me to calm down but he is also having a breakdown with me as he grab my shoulders to make me face him.
“What is that thing I heard about you dying?”I ask with a trembling voice.
“It is about the probabilities I am seeing that started since I was young. For the every day I live. The percentage of the probabilities of me dying is getting uncontrollably high. I tried everything to erase it and change the future, I live my whole life being cautious and not doing anything out of my character but still, it was never enough. The moving up of the probabilities continues.”
“But we can still change it! I will never accept anything just because it was shown by those probabilities! Yuki you cannot just give up like this!”
“Kazuya please stop talking non sense. All we need to do now is accept everything. All I wanted is to see you and make more happy memories together before I die and let you go. I am very sorry and I know that this is too selfish for me to ask but please Kazuya I am begging you, please don’t ever be sad when I am gone. I want you to continue living and I really hope that you can start a new life after I die. You can hate me; you can curse me but please don’t ever be sad and miss me.”
My eyes are full of tears and I cannot see anything as my tears flow down while listening to Yuki. It is so painful. It is something that I have never wished to hear from the only person who showed me how to love.
“How can you ask me to hate you if all I can ever remember when I think of you are the happiest moments in my life? Yuki you are much worse than a selfish person! Don’t you ever think of dying while I am still alive!”
“But I-“
“No more arguments. I already know what to do. Do you think that you are the only person here on earth that have that annoying probabilities? You have me Yuki. You have the bravest man who is willing to go at the end of the world if it will make you stay with me forever.” I wipe his tears with my cold trembling fingers.
“What are you talking about?” His body cannot stop shaking and so I pull him to my chest and hug him tightly to give him the feeling of reassurance.
“I have the same ability as you, though I still cannot use it conveniently right now, I will do my best to find the save you. Even if I have to ask every solutions, even if I have to use it day in and day out, I will never stop until that cursed probability vanish from your sight, so please Yuki, do not give up. We will break the tragic fate together!”