Note: Upgrade your browser if you can't see the images.
Uncontrollably Fond: Journey To Love - Chapter 53
You are reading Uncontrollably Fond: Journey To Love Chapter 53 at mangacake.
Please use the Bookmark button to get notifications about the latest chapters of Uncontrollably Fond: Journey To Love next time when you come visit our manga website
- Home
- All Mangas
- Uncontrollably Fond: Journey To Love
- Chapter 53 - Chapter 53: i'm not a victim i'm the criminal
the first thing I did after settling in the cab, is to call my doctor, I felt like i’m about to break down any moment and I don’t want it, giving the driver the address I looked outside counting the black cars that we pass by trying to forget about my feelings.
after fifteen agonizing minutes I was finally their, paying the cab and telling him to keep the change I went in in a hurry, of course her assistant refused to let me in but after a lot of persuasion she finally did.
knocking on her door I got in after hearing a muffled come in from her.
“I suppose you’re miss white”
“I am, good afternoon doctor i’m sorry for the disturbance but my situation is going down extremely fast these couple days”
“do you want to talk about it? “
“more like I have to, I need help i’m losing control”
“what happened? ” she asked keeping her calm and soft tone. telling her all what happened to me before and that I had already went into some treatment before I was finally done. with a tear stained and puffy face and a running nose.
handing me some tissues, she kept silent for a few seconds before she asked me her first question since I started talking.
“does anyone around you know about all this? “
“some people know something or two, but I never told anyone about what’s going on with my mental state, I tried to though but I don’t get to finish two sentences when they start to find it funny, dramatic,or that it’s something usual and i’m just overreacting.”
“when was it??”
“i don’t know maybe couple years ago?” i said in more like a question than an answer.
“I’ll describe for you some drugs that would help you with your nightmares and your mood swings they’d basically make you relax and prevent you from stressing yourself, they might sometimes make you hungry,or even over energetic sometimes but you would have more peace of mind and control as you referred to, and I advice you to talk at least to someone about it, talking helps, and it would even give them some tips to how they should behave around you at such times, our sessions would be twice a week untill you wouldn’t have to take some certain drugs, do you have any questions? “
“no, thank you very much” and with that I Shook her hand and took my leave, she isn’t as good as the one I used to go to in England but I think she would do for now .
calling an Uber I headed back to Adrean’s home, but once in the car I noticed how haggard and messy I was looking, luckily i always have wipes, foundation and lipstick with me, so fixing my face I put on my sunglasses to cover my eyes since there’s nothing nothing to fix them with, as if it will help anyway they were puffy and red anyone can notice them.
about twenty minutes later I was outside the house, paying the Uber, and taking some deep breaths I went in. I looked around a bit and there was no sign for Adrean, I guess something good happened today, but my relief was short lived too.
with the first step I took to head upstairs I heard Adrean’s voice behind me.
“where were you? “
“somewhere that doesn’t concern you” I answered with a tired voice,not bothering to turn around, well talking for two hours and crying for half of it certainly drains energy.
“we need to be honest with each other if we want to keep on our deal”
“does this mean you want to keep it? i’m not answering you otherwise. “
“I never said I want to end it” he said stating as a matter of fact. and with that I turned around.
“true, i’m the one who did because you’re not doing what we agreed on” I replied nodding my head slowly a yes.
“when dd that ever happen, just because I felt sorry for my cousin? you can’t be that heartless. “
“sadly I really am that heartless, but that’s not the reason, but because you seemed hesitant to act in front of him, and I can’t afford for that to happen, maybe it won’t affect you but it would for me, and I like to play on a solid ground. “
“and how the hell would Adam’s thoughts affect you? do you care that much? “
“I do care that much but not because of the same reason you’re thinking about”
“then tell me why? ” he almost yelled in annoyance. “
“okay then, let’s take a seat and I’ll explain everything for you so that you can make the best decision for yourself, but I don’t have anymore time to waste so if you want to end it I’ll start packing immediately to move on to my next step” and with that said he just nodded a yes and we went to the sitting room”
“Sacha, Niall and I used to be classmates-“
“you already said that before” he cut me off and I sent him a meaningful glare for doing so.
“Sacha was kind of my friend at that time, but later on I discovered that all she wanted is to make herself look better by hanging out with the arrogant bitch as they called me that doesn’t talk with many people, then she started to spread rumors about how fake I was, more details are unnecessary that’s all you need to know. ” I glanced at him to find him fully focused on what i’m saying, crossing my legs and arms I continued the story.
“Niall was basically no one just a random classmate, that Sacha wanted to get along with so she always brought him around, at some point something happened that risked my safety because of him, well not completely but he kind of betrayed me, and I don’t know what’s his reason for coming and wanting to marry me all of a sudden” then I stopped thinking about how I should tell him about Adam’s part I absolutely don’t expect him to believe me and I don’t want to sound like a crazy person.
“go on, what about Adam? ” he questioned impatiently and I just sighed.
“he was my classmate for the longest time, for about ten years, he always wanted to be friends but I always refused tried to say it nicely at first but with his persistence I became harsh and kind of rude but he never stopped, then after some incident we never saw him again. “
“what happened? ” he seemed to want details unsatisfied with my mysterious answer.
“that’s he’s story to tell, all I can tell you now is that if you don’t pull him away from me I’ll destroy him”
“wha-” and this time I cut him off.
“the last time it was me who hot hurt but I don’t intend to make it happen again” still unsatisfied he tried to ask again but I guess he got the idea when he saw my expression.
“you didn’t tell me where did you go before”
“a psychologist ” I answered simply.
“is that why you were crying? ” he said and I snapped my head towards him in surprise that I could swear it would’ve snapped if it was a little faster.
“did you-“
“I did” he answered plainly before I even get the chance to finish my question, and I sighed yet another time, I guess that’s all what i’m doing these days. and I just averted my gaze away from him and nodded my head in acceptance.
“why? “
“why are you so curious you’ve already know what you need”
“is that why you wore sunglasses that day too? you can’t expect them to cover everything do you? “
“yes I cried, I had a breakdown for more than three hours, I even cut my hair, are you happy now? ” I blurted out, damn my hot temper.
“not really you didn’t tell me why” he said again still calm as ever. I closed my eyes and started massaging my temples and thought, maybe I sould tell him not like I know him after all I’ll treat it as if i’m talking to the doctor, and she already told me it would be better if I tell someone, but it was already hard enough to tell her let alone telling him, he’ll pity me and I hate that.
“I have some mood swings issues and depression ” I finally said clenching my fists too much that my nails began to dig in my palm. looking at him again I saw that look I knew he would give, pity. in frustration I got up immediately.
“I told you because I thought it’s your right to know with whome exactly you’re getting involved, you have thirty minutes to make your decision” I said in a distant cold voice and turned around heading to the room i’m staying in, I can’t call it my room, never.
“oh, and one last thing, I rarely pity people and your cousin is not one of those rare cases, so just for your information I won’t respect his feelings nor am I planning to let him off the hook, so you better get him away from me if you really care about him” I said after I stopped in my tracks after couple steps and turned my head slightly .
“why are you saying that all of a sudden? ” again, confused.
“just to make it known that wether with this deal in the middle or not, your cousin and his parents will pay for it all. “
“what do you mean? why are you bringing them into this?. “
“ask them that question they’d know better, and tell them that i’m not the same kid as before, this time i’m not going to be the victim to protect themselves, I’ll be the criminal” with that said I continued my way leaving him as confused as he can ever be.